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Thu, Dec. 18th, 2003, 12:08 pm
Oh ...

Folks, RotK is NOT a movie for small kids. I don't know what the hell makes people think small children are suited to a movie with wars and the hacking and slaying but Jesus! they're not okay?!
There are freaky, nasty bits in this movie, like the other two and the kids are going to start talking or freaking out and annoying the other cinema patrons.

Furthermore, the whole bit before the movie where you're told to switch off your phone, chew quietly and shut the FUCK UP applies to you! not "everyone in the cinema except you" but in fact "everyone in the cinema including you". It may not be America but there's still a chance that someone in the audience has a gun.
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Thu, Dec. 18th, 2003 04:29 am (UTC)

Which obviously means it doesn't matter if you natter away throughout the movie like a big ignorant fucking wanker... unfortunately that makes a certain amount of sense.

Thankfully the music is loud enough to drown out all but the very loudest arsehole but what amazed me was that there were people who, when the music would increase in volume a bit (but still not be at battle scene level) would actually talk louder to be heard over it.

Thu, Dec. 18th, 2003 08:16 am (UTC)

All the above are the precise reasons I'm not fussed on seeing LoTR for a while.

I went to see TTT last year and had nothing but gossipy phone using girls beside me and little kids talking loudly.

It's for this reason I've taken to going to late night movies a couple of weeks into their run. Seeing Kill Bill in a large and mostly quiet cinema was really cool. You'll still get the morons, but you can hiss at them to shut up and they shut up because people find it easy to glare at them :-)

Thu, Dec. 18th, 2003 04:57 am (UTC)

As a matter of interest - what cert does the film have? I let my daughter watch it on DVD when she was 4 1/2... she loves the Shire scenes as far as the eleventyfirst party, obviously. But for battle scenes and otherwise scary, tense bits, it's very much a case of her sitting on my knee, me reassuring her that everything is going to be all right, and somewhat spoiling it for her by distracting her/telling her about the next bit. I wouldn't dream of letting an under-10 watch it in the cinema.

Totally agree with you about cimema conversations... ok, the odd expletive, "Wow!", or whatever is fine, but apart from that - STFU!

Thu, Dec. 18th, 2003 05:38 am (UTC)

Not sure, and I wouldn't have a problem with letting kids see the fellowship but after that I'd be hesitant.

Still... asking about the cert displays a level of sensibility far beyond most of the parents in there.

Thu, Dec. 18th, 2003 09:39 am (UTC)

The film is 12-PG, or PG-12, or whatever the story is these days. Knowing your kids (in so far as I do) I'd almost be inclined to bring your daughter but not your son, but ymmv.

Fri, Dec. 19th, 2003 04:00 am (UTC)

No - there's no way I'd bring her to a film lasting more than 90 minutes. It's the 5-year-old boredom threshold thing... even though Shrek is now one of her favourite films, she still got very restless during the last 20 minutes of it when I brought her to see it in the cinema.

Thu, Dec. 18th, 2003 05:14 am (UTC)

People are feckin' morons.

My favorite example? I went to a midnight-ish showing of The Matrix (yes, the original one). It ended at almost three. Exiting the theater, I saw a family with a younger girl, about 4-5 years old. Not only had they taken her to an ultraviolent R-rated movie, but they'd dragged her out of the house for a midnight showing. Three AM and this poor little girl was so tired that she was staggering. All because her parents are idiots and too selfish to think of their child and get a goddamn babysitter.

Elayna has not seen and will not see an R-rated movie until she's a teenager. I still vet the PG movies for her, let alone the PG-13s.

Thu, Dec. 18th, 2003 05:15 am (UTC)

Gah. YOUNG. Not younger.

Thu, Dec. 18th, 2003 07:26 am (UTC)

And the irony is that "responsible" parenting is less about checking what your kid is watching and making sure they have enough sleep and less about your sexual orientation and marital status.

Which I suppose makes those WASP drunkard SUV piloting drunken soccer moms feel better about themselves.

Still, bravo - there are too many kids out there whose parents think that "vetting" means "yelling at the video store clerk for letting the parents rent out an 18 cert movie for their kids"

Thu, Dec. 18th, 2003 11:52 am (UTC)

Elayna gets half an hour of TV a day, and that's TV approved by us. Though she's yet to ask for anything we'd have any qualms about. If she wants an extra half hour of TV, she has to read for half an hour to earn it.

And that's only after she's done all of her homework.

...yeah. I don't know. It's *easy* to raise a kind, courteous, smart child. To raise not just a good kid, but a Good Person. All you have to do, really, is pay attention to them.

Thu, Dec. 18th, 2003 02:58 pm (UTC)

I think you get what millions of parents don't seem to realise.
And it seems like such a simple concept too.

Thu, Dec. 18th, 2003 05:34 am (UTC)

What I found when I went to see The Two Towers was that some parents brought their kids, and the movie being as long as it was, the kiddies got bored. So the parents being the wisdom filled fonts of knowlegde that they were allowed the kids to 'play' in the space between the screen and the front seats. THAT was a case of grade A idiocy.

Also, when some one speaks in the cinema, or in my best case when an oriental guy answered his phone, a dig to the back of the seat/head shuts most people up!