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Fri, Sep. 29th, 2006, 12:02 pm

Where did you wake up this morning?
In my bed at home with a copy of Promethian stuck to my face and a new Authority comic book (Mark Millar didn't write this one so it was refreshingly devoid of gay jokes and polemic) digging into my back. I should stop sleeping with books when followthebird isn't around, it is uncomfortable and decidedly freudian.

When was the last time you cried?
The end of "Children of Men" drew a couple of sniffles and moist eye moments from me but I can't remember the last time I outright cried.

Apart from your home and your car, what is the most expensive thing you've ever bought?
I refuse to buy a home because I resent paying anywhere between a third to a half of a million euros for something that is of a quality lower than one of those Ikea DIY houses and that'll last about as long before either falling in on itself or becoming a bloody tenement. I don't buy or need a car because I live close to work, I prefer to walk everywhere to keep in shape and I'm not inclined to over contribute to the end of the world.

So, apart from the things I don't own, the most expensive thing I've ever owned I think was my old Sony Vaio at about 1,500 euro. I have ditched that in favour of my 1,000 12" apple powerbook which I love very very much. When I'm in boston I'm going to avoid the apple store in case I end up cheating on it with a dual core apple megabook thing.

When were you last naked in front of another person?

Earlier in the week

Ever been chatted up by another (your job here)?

Once, way way way back. It was my first job, it was a company newbie night out and one of the other newbies spent the whole evening chatting me up. She was very pretty but I was going out with someone at the time so I didn't act on it. A shame really because she seemed very nice and the woman I was going out with at the time was a horrible bitch and we broke up a few days later.

What do you dislike most about yourself?

Nothing much really. My weight maybe, but I'm doing something about that... well... not the weight exactly - I haven't lost an ounce in the past two months but the proportion of blubber to muscle has shifted drasticly in favour of the muscle end of the ratio so thats just as good.

Who did you last recieve a text from and what did it say?

From cartographer this morning informing me that she would like cheese when she got home.

What's been the most embarrassing moment of your life?

I honestly don't remember, I don't generally feel embarassed because I rarely end up in situations where that is possible and I have a pragmatic attitude towards any other occasions that could be embarassing.

What was the last lie you told?

Can't remember that either, I don't bother telling lies, too much hassle to keep the tissue of falsehoods intact. Easier to tell the truth and not care about the consequences.

If you were invisible for a day, what would be the first thing you'd do?
According to a survey on the subject several years ago, roughly 50% of men said that given the power of invisibility they would use it to fight crime. The other 50% said they'd use it to look at people naked in changing rooms and showers. I decided long ago that I would combine those two by fighting naked evil.