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Thu, Jul. 14th, 2005, 09:40 am

Is there something particularly boring about the last 24 hours that so many people are getting their panties in a bind about the immature scrawlings of a borderline mysoginist who blames women for all of his shortcomings?
I mean, over the years I've done most of the crap in this "nice guys" essay, listened to the nonsense, accepted the platonic hugs but at least I had the balls to admit it was because I was a coward more than she was a devil woman pulling my strings like a master puppeteer towards whatever vindictive end she had in mind. Nice guys don't finish last, guys who obsess over women who are obviously not interested (and obviously never will be) not only finish last but do so because they're deliberately saboutaging their own efforts.

Short version: If anyone finds themselves paying any heed to that pile of crap you might want to consider going through that last bit of puberty you've obviously been putting off and grow a pair before talking to someone who doesn't see you as a friend.

Thu, Jul. 14th, 2005 09:31 am (UTC)
caturah

I've been having a really crap week. That's my excuse.

Thu, Jul. 14th, 2005 09:36 am (UTC)
mr_wombat

I should clarify that last paragraph by saying that I meant if anyone thought the essay was in any way accurate or insightful or contained even a germ or useful information then they needed help.

Thu, Jul. 14th, 2005 09:38 am (UTC)
caturah

Ah, fair enough

Thu, Jul. 14th, 2005 11:50 am (UTC)
mr_wombat

I'm complaining *about* the people taking it seriously, not about the post itself.

Thu, Jul. 14th, 2005 11:43 am (UTC)
natural20

Not that I'm necessarily disagreeing with you, but it was written by a woman... That may be an important point.

Other than that, hmm, it was written by someone in university, so yeah, had I read it then I think I would have paid far more attention, now, not so much.

However, I would just like to reiterate the whole "written by a woman" thing as I think it puts a rather different light on it to the one you're reading it in.

Thu, Jul. 14th, 2005 11:52 am (UTC)
mr_wombat

Y'know I read it once and scanned it a couple of times trying to figure out who wrote it and I really got a man vibe from it. I guess that changes it from being vaguely pathetic to being vaguely insulting.

Thu, Jul. 14th, 2005 12:08 pm (UTC)
caturah

I must be the only one who felt that the condescending, insulting tone of the thing wasn't changed at all by the sex of the author.

Thu, Jul. 14th, 2005 12:49 pm (UTC)
cartographer

I had to go looking for it (Stupid LJ. Stupid productivity.), but I reckoned it was written by a guy as well, and about a girl in particular who he was passive-aggressively failing to get off with. I found him a bit needy, but not actively offensive. It's kind of more annoying and egotistical if written by a girl. She's probably about 19 though. We were all annoying and egotistical at 19. I was, anyway. (Not now of course *ahem*)

Thu, Jul. 14th, 2005 12:59 pm (UTC)
washedoutvampir

Nah, me too.

Mon, Jul. 25th, 2005 07:55 pm (UTC)
microgirl

OH, was it definitely actually written by a woman? Do you have definitve proof? That is so weird. I'd've sworn up and down it was a guy. I have no idea what to make of it if written by a woman. It just reads completely like a guy.

Tue, Jul. 26th, 2005 09:25 am (UTC)
natural20

Definitive proof? No, I don't, and yes, I know I shouldn't believe everything I read on the 'net etc. etc, but all of the references I found on my very brief look around said it was a girl.

Heck, for all we know it could have been written by a committee of over 70s transexual lesbians.

Thu, Jul. 14th, 2005 12:48 pm (UTC)
penexpers

I have utterly no idea what you're talking about but I'm vaguely intereted. URL, maybe?

Thu, Jul. 14th, 2005 12:52 pm (UTC)
mr_wombat

Not a clue, its been posted in a few journals - here it is:

Part 1
This is a tribute to the nice guys. The nice guys that finish last,
that never become more than friends, that endure hours of whining and
bitching about what assholes guys are, while disproving the very point.
This is dedicated to those guys who always provide a shoulder to lean
on but restrain themselves to tentative hugs, those guys who hold open
doors and give reassuring pats on the back and sit patiently outside
the changing room at department stores. This is in honor of the guys
that obligingly reiterate how cute/beautiful/smart/funny/sexy their
female friends are at the appropriate moment, because they know most
girls need that litany of support. This is in honor of the guys with
open minds, with laid-back attitudes, with honest concern. This is in
honor of the guys who respect a girl’s every facet, from her privacy to
her theology to her clothing style.



This is for the guys who escort their drunk, bewildered female friends
back from parties and never take advantage once they’re at her door,
for the guys who accompany girls to bars as buffers against the rest of
the creepy male population, for the guys who know a girl is fishing for
compliments but give them out anyway, for the guys who always play by
the rules in a game where the rules favor cheaters, for the guys who
are accredited as boyfriend material but somehow don’t end up being
boyfriends, for all the nice guys who are overlooked, underestimated,
and unappreciated, for all the nice guys who are manipulated, misled,
and unjustly abandoned, this is for you.



This is for that time she left 40 urgent messages on your cell phone,
and when you called her back, she spent three hours painstakingly
dissecting two sentences her boyfriend said to her over dinner. And
even though you thought her boyfriend was a chump and a jerk, you
assured her that it was all ok and she shouldn’t worry about it. This
is for that time she interrupted the best killing spree you’d ever
orchestrated in GTA3 to rant about a rumor that romantically linked her
and the guy she thinks is the most repulsive person in the world. And
even though you thought it was immature and you had nothing against the
guy, you paused the game for two hours and helped her concoct a
counter-rumor to spread around the floor. This is also for that time
she didn’t have a date, so after numerous vows that there was nothing
“serious” between the two of you, she dragged you to a party where you
knew nobody, the beer was awful, and she flirted shamelessly with you,
justifying each fit of reckless teasing by announcing to everyone: “oh,
but we’re just friends!” And even though you were invited purely as a
symbolic warm body for her ego, you went anyways. Because you’re nice
like that.

Thu, Jul. 14th, 2005 12:52 pm (UTC)
mr_wombat

Part 2
The nice guys don’t often get credit where credit is due. And perhaps
more disturbing, the nice guys don’t seem to get laid as often as they
should. And I wish I could logically explain this trend, but I can’t.
From what I have observed on campus and what I have learned from
talking to friends at other schools and in the workplace, the only
conclusion I can form is that many girls are just illogical,
manipulative bitches. Many of them claim they just want to date a nice
guy, but when presented with such a specimen, they say irrational,
confusing things such as “oh, he’s too nice to date” or “he would be a
good boyfriend but he’s not for me” or “he already puts up with so much
from me, I couldn’t possibly ask him out!” or the most frustrating of
all: “no, it would ruin our friendship.” Yet, they continue to lament
the lack of datable men in the world, and they expect their
too-nice-to-date male friends to sympathize and apologize for the men
that are jerks. Sorry, guys, girls like that are beyond my ability to
fathom. I can’t figure out why the connection breaks down between what
they say (I want a nice guy!) and what they do (I’m going to sleep with
this complete ass now!). But one thing I can do, is say that the
nice-guy-finishes-last phenomenon doesn’t last forever. There are
definitely many girls who grow out of that train of thought and realize
they should be dating the nice guys, not taking them for granted. The
tricky part is finding those girls, and even trickier, finding the ones
that are single.



So, until those girls are found, I propose a toast to all the nice
guys. You know who you are, and I know you’re sick of hearing yourself
described as ubiquitously nice. But the truth of the matter is, the
world needs your patience in the department store, your holding open of
doors, your party escorting services, your propensity to be a sucker
for a pretty smile. For all the crazy, insane, absurd things you
tolerate, for all the situations where you are the faceless, nameless
hero, my accolades, my acknowledgement, and my gratitude go out to you.
You do have credibility in this society, and your well deserved
vindication is coming.



Repost this if you're a nice guy

Girls Repost if you're lookin for this/or appreciate these guys