The next morning I got up to go to the loo at around ten am, grabbed my tee shirt, shook it out and the biggest goddamned beetle I've ever seen landed on my bedsheets right in front of me. I'm not ashamed to say that I screamed a bit. The day got better when my brother and I went for a drive to pick some stuff up from the newly opened Argos in town. Its never really a good idea to bring me into Cavan town when I'm single, (relatively) few things annoy me quicker than seeing the number of attractive women I see hanging on the arms of bulbous, red faced, buck toothed, big eared, mongoloid cretins who wander around, all out of breath from the effort of walking. Today was no exception. On the way back we drove past my deceased grandad's old place where I discovered that it was being moved into by the overpriveliged little snot of a son of the most pompous jackass in the neighbourhood following a vigorous remodelling. Then we stopped by my Uncle's place only to find him screaming at the taps because the roadworks down the way had caused the taps to alternate between spewing liquids that looked like either coffee or milk.
It was with great relief that I got back home last night I can tell you.