The Bunny Bacchus (mr_wombat) wrote,
The Bunny Bacchus

Scarytale of finglas

A couple of years back I lived in a house in Finglas with some friends. The house had had many many occupants over the years but at this stage the place was largely splitting up and only one of the original occupants was remaining in the house, myself and two others were moving out (I to move in with metalrabbit and the other two were moving into a flat) and the remaining original occupant wasn't doing much about finding replacements for us, so in the interests of a quiet life, we decided to face interviewing potential occupants rather than dealing with repercussions and recriminations later.

We placed an ad in the herald and here and there elsewhere and had many applicants for the rooms (one single and one double) in the end we gave the double room to a pair of particularly pleasant spanish ladies who were students in Trinity if I recall correctly. The single room was more of a problem though as the only applicants there were... well... dodgy. Some of them had nasty scars, some of them had those trademark blackened knuckles that indicated having been in mountjoy prison, one of them seemed to have an artificial eye.

Now, as tempting as it was to lease the room to one of the scary people to teach our former flatmate a lesson about responsibility (since he hadn't even been around to show people the rooms or meet the people he would be living with) we decided to go with the least of the evils and rent to a guy called kevin. Kevin seemed a little wierd, sort of like a man who WANTED to be a gameshow host but never made it because national TV wasn't ready for jokes about being hit by trucks or anal sex. That said, he seemed *relatively* okay, especially compared to the guy who was distinctly reluctant to reveal his previous address.

We moved out, nothing more was heard for several months until one day I got a mail from one of the other guys in the house who informed me that Kevin had been a naughty boy, coming out with statements along the lines of "I'm a bit sexually frustrated, and when men get frustrated, thats when women get raped" - so, moved beyond "a little odd" and right into" get him the fuck away from me" territory at a considerable pace. He'd also freaked the others out by complimenting their clothes in a manner that suggested he either liked the clothes, liked the guy in it, liked the guy, or was going to kill the guy and take his clothes. He watched porn in the sitting room (for you non irish readers, this is a MAJOR no no in shared accomodation, whatever you crazy frat kids get up to) and he never paid the rent. So eventually he was asked to move out.

His idea of moving out was to take the key of the room and NOTHING else, he left the room locked and all his gear in it. Eventually they had to kick it in to clear the place out for someone new and they discovered the room packed with porn, magazines, videos and god knows what else. The blankets were burned, the porn was sold to cover rent and what was left (or too dodgy to sell) went on the bonfire.

Kevin was never heard from again, until a few days back when the landlord came to collect the rent told them that Kevin had just been arrested for killing his own mother.

Next time, I get references.
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