The Bunny Bacchus (mr_wombat) wrote,
The Bunny Bacchus

The one that got away.

Suggested by doriangray

4: Use of the english language.
Despite the fact that the english language is a funny beast that employs strange grammatical and spelling rules with even stranger exceptions (I before E except after C - stemming from an old tradition started by Lord Chattanooga of Yorkshire after a game of polo went awry. You see they were playing polo on a pitch beside a cliff. Lord Chattanooga went in for a daring tackle but accidentally fell off the cliff. As he plunged to his doom the other players heard him screaming AIEEEEEEEEEE!!!! - rather than the more traditional YEAAAAAGH!! - until he landed in the sea below and drowned. In his memory the other players coined the new rule of AI before EEEE, except after C).
Anyway, the point is that if you do not have a proper (and complete) command of the queen's english then you are obviously an utter fool. Though I have not the first clue how to change the oil in a car or how to perform CPR (and frankly, letting me rewire a plug is a recipe for disaster, you'd save a lot of time by just sticking a knife in the toaster yourself and then burning the place down) I can still feel smug and superior to people who can do all of the above and more because 50 people reading my livejournal recognise my amazing command of spelling and grammar.

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